I heard this from a young lady I was having lunch with the other day.

I met a young friend of mine at a local resturant this past week. She is a nice girl, but she is a Hillary lover and she believes anything she hears on the Entertainment Channel. When the waiter came around she ordered salad and I ordered the fried chicken plate. She was horrified at my choice of food and the following words came out of her mouth. Scout's honor. "Are you going to eat that?" she asked.

"No, I thought to myself, "I am going to dress it up in a tux and take it to the opera." I said, "Yes, I plan to."

"You know," said she, "that chickens have the same right to live the full extent of their lives as we do. Furthermore, that chicken most likely had a family." I thought I was having trouble hearing her. I stared at her intently.

"Huh ?" I said.

"Yes, chickens, cows, goats, fish, all animals have a right to life, liberty and happiness," she continued. I think its in the Bill of Rights or something, anyway when Hillary gets elected president we are going to put a stop to all this cannibalism. People should eat vegetables, milk, fruit and eggs and things like that. That way no animal is hurt."

"Don't vegetables have feelings?" I innocently asked. "And what about those poor chickens who lose their little babies so that we can have scrambled eggs in the morning? Don't they suffer separation anxiety? I am sure that they have already named those eggs before they are taken away."

She pondered that for a moment while staring at her salad, and then said, " Well, I don't know if vegetables have feelings or not. But, I am sure that the chickens miss their babies. I suppose I will have to quit having eggs for breakfast." She looked morosely at the table top. "I like eggs, too, " she said.

"What about milk? Maybe the cows don't like having their udders squeezed so that you can have milk on your cereal," I said as I took a big bite out of my chicken leg. "And orange juice, maybe the oranges object to having their pulp squeezed out."

"Well, I don't know," she replied, " I'll have to check with PETA about that."

I looked at her using my most serious expression and said, "You know what PETA stands for, don't you?"

"Well, yes, its People for the Ethical Treatment for Animals, or something like that," she answered.

"No," I replied, "Its People Eating Tasty Animals. P E T A."

"It is not! Is it? Really? No its not ... is it?"

With a satisfied sigh I took another big bite of my fried chicken. I could almost hear it scream.